Not Giving Up is REALLY hard.

Short Version
Even though I have slacked on writing I have not given up.
Moving up to PG might kill me.
I am addicted to sugar and having a fresh start.

Left: Me, Right: Awesome skater Brandy! 

Not giving up is hard. I am usually a quitter. My mom is well aware that she is a quitter and I was allowed to quit anything I did not like as a kid. So all this not quitting is really hard. I told my pal B that I am proud of myself for going from a really crappy skater to a just plain crappy skater. And if I had given up that would not be the case. I would not be any sort of skater. I would just talk all big about it and not do it. But that is totally not cool, so will not be quitting until I am done! 

On Sunday I did my first practice with the PG team. OMG I was terrified. Those girls are serious. No more just skating around getting you to it stuff. I have moved on to the blocking and jamming and learning the actual rules for real. G is too easy now. Maybe one day I will be able to say that about PG but I have to keep not quitting to get there. 

I have learned a lot about myself these past few weeks. I am totally addicted to sugar. I apparently can cut out any other food like a bad boyfriend and never think of it again unless it contains sugar. Then I am hooked and I just can't walk away. So I have managed to turn away cupcakes and other non-vegan goodies which in many respects is a HUGE step. But there is a lot of sugary vegan crap in the world. So my next phase is to tackle the sugar demon. 

Along with my propensity for quitting, I love a fresh start. As a kid I went to 6 different schools from K - 8th grade. I have no idea how I reacted in the early years but the last couple of moves were a relief. I got to walk away from all the embarrassing crap I did. All the terrible things I said and all he people I had pissed off. Then High school was a fresh start, then college, then moving to Atlanta, then I went through a string of jobs, boyfriends, and living situations. All of these had an element of a fresh start. Now I have been married to the same man and lived in the same house for 10 years. I have had several jobs and done all sorts of crazy hobbies and such ( like roller derby). But this is the longest I have stuck to anything in my 37 years. The husband is easy no desire for a new one there. But I do get itchy feet to move to a new house, a new town, a new life all the time. Not that what I have is not good enough I am just addicted to the new. The excitement, the fresh start is all so alluring for me.  

So tomorrow is a new day and for now that is going to have to be enough of a fresh start.